Vigil sheds light on bullying

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Suicide of Cashmere student is closed case for Sheriff’s office

By Dee Riggs
World staff writer

Sunday, February 5, 2012

World photo/Dee Riggs

Family and friends gather at Pioneer Park in Wenatchee to honor Rafael Morelos and to talk about how hurtful bullying is. Morelos, 14, committed suicide Jan. 29. He was an eighth grader at Cashmere Middle School but had attended Pioneer Middle School in Wenatchee earlier this fall and last spring.

WENATCHEE — Friends and family of a 14-year-old Cashmere boy who hanged himself Jan. 29 said during a candlelight vigil Friday night that he had been bullied because he was gay.

“He told me he got shoved and punched in the face in PE in the locker room at Cashmere,” said Lexii Mullin of Wenatchee, a friend of Rafael Morelos.

“He was tired of people saying that his little brothers would follow in his footsteps and be gay too,” said Maranda Blankenship of Wenatchee.

The girls met Rafael when he was a student at Pioneer Middle School in Wenatchee last spring and this September. They said they had remained his friends after his family moved to Cashmere this fall and he enrolled in Cashmere Middle School.

Rafael Morelos

Lexi said someone created a fake Facebook page so he or she could talk to Rafael rudely.

Rob Cline, principal at Cashmere Middle School, said by phone on Friday that there was no ongoing investigation into Rafael being bullied at the school. He said that Rafael had, earlier in the school year, reported one incidence of being bullied but “we took care of that. We investigated and took appropriate action.”

Cline declined to say what action the district took, or when during the school year Rafael complained to the school about being bullied.

“Student discipline is not something I am at liberty to share,” Cline said.

The Chelan County Sheriff’s Office investigated the case and determined that it was a suicide and there was no foul play involved.

“You’re the first one who ever indicated to me that he had been bullied,” said Sheriff Brian Burnett in a phone interview Saturday.

Lt. Maria Agnew said earlier this week that bullying “did not come up in the investigation and there is no evidence that would support that right now.”

She said the investigation is closed. Burnett said it would only be opened if the school or family presented evidence of bullying.

World photo/Dee Riggs

Malinda Morelos, mother of Rafael Morelos, shares her concerns about bullying at the candlelight vigil.

Rafael’s mother, Malinda Morelos, said during an interview Thursday afternoon that she did not hear that her son was bullied until a candlelight vigil Tuesday near their home on Eels Road in Cashmere.

“Almost all the kids here told me he was being bullied,” she said. “There were at least 100 people at the vigil.”

She said her son kept his feelings to himself and “he pretended everything was OK.” She said she has known her son was gay for several years.

She said Rafael left a short note before he died that said, ‘Sawwy, guys, but I love you guys.”

At the vigil, Malinda said her son, “sometimes acted strong but, inside, he was dying little by little.”

Janis Hayden, the mother of a Cashmere student, said an account has been set up at Cashmere Valley Bank so people can donate to help the family defray costs associated with Rafael’s death.

Dee Riggs: 664-7147

deeriggs@wenatcheeworld.com

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Peggy 1 year, 3 months ago

So very sad. My heart aches for this family's loss.

VALOREENA 1 year, 3 months ago

Kids who are harrassed by others and report it have to fear retaliation. It doesn't stop "bullies". Or maybe it will stop the one bully, but there are plenty more out there. It is disheartening and sad. I don't fully agree that it is the schools that need to address harrassment. It has to be taught at home...good examples set by parents.

My thoughts are with this childs family and friends. It has been a tough week for those that knew and loved him.

mizmaus 1 year, 3 months ago

All schools MUST have a ZERO tolerance for bullying. Someone at school knew what was happening to this boy and did nothing. That has to change. Please kids, that person you're picking on has a heart and soul just like you. Becareful. Teens are fragile. They can break. I wish there was a way to really show kids that it gets better; It gets so much better; So hang in there; You are so special. No one can take your place.

ross 1 year, 3 months ago

um hi i guess i now a lot of bullies because i am a bully that stop last year when i met rafel he was an amazing person i thought like if he was my brother but we got into lots of fights. we were still friends i really did not care if he was gay its what is about him from the inside and no one can change who the person is. you find out more of the person by being there friend. I really need to help people stop bulling and if people can't change i will have to make the change. Because they changed one person to do suicide. He reminded me of my older bother he was greater then my brother he was like my best friend but i stop talking to him after seventh grade

red4ord 1 year, 3 months ago

The sheriff doesn't look too good in announcing the now 'closed' investigation' -A little prematurely ? Maybe somebody's well connected kid to protect? And How about the school? Surely the we had a report it was 'handled'now seems like another COVER-UP....doesnt it???

kyook 1 year, 3 months ago

Sorry WenatcheeView, anonymous posting is not allowed.

AnonymityPlease 1 year, 3 months ago

I think it's pretty ridiculous for Burnett to claim he hadn't heard claims of bullying until this Saturday. I would hope our sheriff would read the local newspaper. Homophobic behavior should not be tolerated at schools. It's bad enough that many of the students hear homophobic remarks at home, at school there should be a zero acceptance policy on homophobic behavior. Most of the people displaying these behaviors are not actually phobic of homosexuality, they are simply not tolerant of homosexual's lifestyles. I have several gay friends that wish they could live normal lives but can't. They don't choose to like people of the same sex, they just can't help what they feel. Anyone that says that being gay is a choice is flat out wrong. If you can be open-minded enough to get to know a few gay people you'll find that some of them really don't want to be gay but simply can't help it. I hope that the hearts of all the people that teased Rafael for being gay are heavy now, I hope they learn something from this loss of life. This is terribly sad and so unnecessary. No one should ever be made fun of to the point that ending their life seems easier than living it.

Tim 1 year, 3 months ago

This is so sad but it is wrong for you to tun it into a gay rights issue. It's not political, it's not even about tolerance it's about simple respect and kindness.

His mother didn't even know he was bullied. The note he left gives no indication of bullying. It sounds like a confused young man who couldn't cope with a lot of things. A lot of people let this kid down.

This is not a time for more blame and spreading hurt and anger, it's a time for awareness and healing.

kyook 1 year, 3 months ago

The "gay rights" issue cannot be dismissed. It is integral to the story.

Tim 1 year, 3 months ago

I don't agree. It's about a troubled boy not a cross section of society.

kyook 1 year, 3 months ago

A troubled boy is the cross section of society. Integral in the story is the fact that he wouldn't have been so troubled if he hadn't had his rights violated & been bullied because he was gay.

mizmaus 1 year, 3 months ago

At 14, he wasn't required to write a note that any of the WW staff found acceptable. Also, "sounds like a confused young man who couldn't cope with a lot of things..."is arrogant and condescending beyond belief! Every child at that school,or any public school has the absolute right to attend school in an atmosphere conducive to his or her education,Free from verbal or physical assaults. Any school which cannot provide that safe,learning environment,isn't earning their money or serving their students well or fairly,imo.

Tim 1 year, 3 months ago

"Also, "sounds like a confused young man who couldn't cope with a lot of things..."is arrogant and condescending beyond belief!"

I have no issue with anything you said but this. He was a troubled youth who's own mother had no idea he was bullied let alone thinking of suicide. He wrote a note apologizing for his actions. Doesn't sound like a kid who was sure about anything.

The family is in my prayers and I meant no disrespect. Kids just fall through the cracks sometimes, it happens. I believe the Lord has pitty on confused and troubled children.

mizmaus 1 year, 3 months ago

Adolescents have trouble talking to their Moms about their pimples;how on earth could one discuss thoughts of suicide or the reasons for them? Just because he didn't clearly state in any final note what happened to drive him to such a terrible act at age 14, does NOT mean the bullying didn't happen. You have No proof, other than his suicide, he was a "troubled youth". Maybe he attended a troubled, confused school, which could not identify or control distruptive students who threatened others, and, perhaps, now, that a student has taken his own life, that school wants to shoulder No responsibility, maybe everyone who could look into it has looked for 30 seconds, and says:"I see Nothing; the kid was a confused, troubled youth." Just maybe? Who knows? At least, he didn't drown.

Norm 1 year, 3 months ago

" "sounds like a confused young man who couldn't cope with a lot of things..."is arrogant and condescending beyond belief! "

No, its neither arrogant nor condescending; its a factual statement.

"You have No proof, other than his suicide, he was a "troubled youth". "

Considering suicide is pretty much the definition of being "troubled", so what other "proof" could possibly be necessary? You seem to think you are arguing against some value judgment here, but all you are arguing against is the definition of words. Saying that somebody is "troubled" is not at all saying that they are a bad person.

mizmaus 1 year, 3 months ago

I am arguing agaainst a fast judgement, with little examination of the facts, into what happened prior to the suicide of this 14 year old boy. To me, it seems the highest prority, as with the last death of a 14 year old is to make sure the school not look bad, rather look honestly into any real problem. I was happy to see in the WW recent story that WHS did identify a number of potential real problems that could lead to student injury, and is acting correctly, in my view, to correct them. Sadly, these wise correctiond of a problem always seem to happen after a child is injured. Everyone knows that school bullying has been a national topic of discussion because of episodes,some even videoed by parents and others, where proof was presented in a court of law. There have been many suicides by young students because of school bullys. It is a problem everywhere it seems. Every school should have a policy in place to deal with school bullies so that so student is threatened, certainly not because of his or her sexual identity. Strong federal protects adults. children and teens must have the same protections. Schools which allow overt bullying of students for any sexual identity reason,or for any reason, must be identified and be brought into line with the letter and spirit of the law. Being ostrich-like to make a local school look good while avoiding a real issue is dumb and hurts kids, even bullys. two kids have spoken out that this boy was bullied. What is needed, half the student body? I salute the courage and conscience of those who spoke out. You have put your "adult" mentors to shame. They will slink around with a need to confess, while you hold your head up and walk free.

JimboBear 1 year, 3 months ago

" Schools which allow overt bullying of students for any sexual identity reason, or for any reason, must be identified and be brought into line with the letter and spirit of the law."
Ms. Labuda, do you honestly believe that there are schools and educators out there who just don't care if someone is "bullied" and choose to nothing to correct the situation if evidence of such appears? It seems to me that you just have an overpowering desire to classify and put some sort of label on every sort of behavior by anyone. While I don't condone any sort of harrassment by and of kids or adults anywhere, it happens. It has been happening to kids at school since the advent of schools, wheather public or private. It happens because kids grow up with some sort of social "class" mentality which is more than likely fueled by the parents themselves and is really not something that educators should be taken to task about. I have no doubt that they will react if they see it in practice in the school, but I don't believe that you or anyone else should expect teachers and staff at the schools to be shaping your child's personality. That's the parent's job. Stop looking for someone to blame and keep a close eye on your own child's social adjustment. That's the job of all of us as parents and grandparents'

webwolf 1 year, 3 months ago

mizmaus 1 year, 3 months ago

Thank you for your opinion, Jim. I do get wound up. My opinion was based entirely on what I've read about the story in the WW. I feel that the larger issue is whether the Cashmere school has a problem with a failure to have in place a policy of how it handles situations where some kids bully and/or threaten others. I don't know anymore than you if this 14 year old boy was bullied, but two witnesses stated he was. For two school kids to speak out, knowing their peers might find out, I tend to believe what they said is true. The figures don't lie that bullying is a big problem in schools nationwide; I don't think we are any different here. Statistics show that many kids face these problems. I think all schools need to prepare good plans in advance of the problem; just like WVH has now made good plans to insure safety in its swim program.

JimboBear 1 year, 3 months ago

My point exactly Chris. I was too, and if I were to mention the names of some of those involved it would probably raise a few eyebrows around the valley as well. I went from being some sort of low life because of my family and suffering the wrath of my fellow students because of it, to being considered the tough guy bully myself, although neither was a true reflection of who I was at the time or what I would become. Sure, the schools took some action, with corporal punishment, after school detention, poor citizenship marks and threats of expulsion, but what can the school actually do? Do those who believe that the school needs to do more, really believe that kids (especially teenagers) are not capable of completely fooling the school administration and keeping them in the dark about such things happening?

Here's another question for those people. How much of this "bullying" activity is only talked about at school, but actually carried out after school hours and off the school property? I'd venture a guess that it's the majority of it. So what is the school supposed to do about that? Overstep their authority and attempt to punish someone for calling another kid names at the theater or skating rink? Even if they get wind of something happening on school property but they haven't any hard evidence, what are they to do? Violate state laws and fail to provide the bullies a public education? Send poor citizenship marks home with the student on his academic achievement progress reports? You can bet that after the first time the parents bounce the bullies about that, the kids will figure out how to change those marks before showing them to parents. Perhaps they could mail an informative letter to the home of a latch key student who is at home hours before his/her parents each day. Yeah, that should reach the parents with no problem.

Folks, wake up! It's not the school's job! It's ours as parents. Quit trying to pass your parenting duties off on the schools. Let them concentrate on academic learning and take care of the social training at home where it belongs. It's not the school's fault that you are raising a bully or that your neighbor is doing so either for that matter.

Norm 1 year, 3 months ago

"Folks, wake up! It's not the school's job! It's ours as parents. Quit trying to pass your parenting duties off on the schools."

The fact that its the parents' job does not mean that its not also the school's job. Yes, many parents should do a better job, but the fact is that schools have to deal with many students whose parents don't regardless of whether they should.

"It's not the school's fault that you are raising a bully or that your neighbor is doing so either for that matter."

Finding fault isn't the central issue here: preventing this sort of thing from happening in the future is the central issue.

JimboBear 1 year, 3 months ago

" preventing this sort of thing from happening in the future is the central issue."

Shave off the cuddle fuzz and face reality Norm. It will NEVER happen. I'm not saying that it shouldn't, but I'd lay darn good odds that it never will. It's the way people are, and a kid needs to learn to accept that and deal with it. That's part of growing up, when you accept what is and learn to deal with it "while" you work to change it if you think it needs to be changed. It is the school's job to enforce all rules concerning what happens on school property, NO WHERE ELSE !! Sorry, but I'll stand by that. When the school starts telling my grand kids what they can do off the school grounds, then I'm going to go visit that school and find out just where they think they acquired such authority. The state didn't give it to them, and neither did anyone else. The only time they have any control over a child's activity off the school grounds is when they are in charge of those kids during an off campus field trip or event of some sort.

JimboBear 1 year, 3 months ago

"Extremely broad I would say"

Thanks CArch. Yes, I would think so too. If ever I heard a "CMA" statement, that is surely one. Some school district attorney almost earned his pay for dreaming that one up. The fact remains, what my kid does off campus is of no concern to the school or the district unless it directly effects their ability to conduct school functions. I don't see how that can be argued.

Seven 1 year, 3 months ago

My kids attend school in the Wenatchee school district...when they were in elementary school they had educational times that they talked about bullying, and how there was zero tolerance for it....Its important that kids are educated early on this, and know right from wrong with bullying. I know this cant stop all instances, but them learning at an early age is good. We need to educate.

Tim 1 year, 3 months ago

Right on Jimbo. Parents think they need to give their children room to grow; that kids will sort it out. Parents need to be involved. It's not so hard to see subtle changes in kids or to tell when one is troubled but you have to have a connection with them to get them to open up and talk. Kids need to talk.

Get involved with your kids and stay involved. If nothing more than being a daily encourager. Go to the school and talk to teachers. Go to you kids ball games and dances. Schools ALWAYS need more parent volunteers chaperone's, volunteer for field trips. If your kid protests your involvement it's time to find out what they are doing they don't want you to see.

You only get a few years to be an effective parent. Your kids will forgive you later. You can be their friend when they grow up, they need love, AND discipline; they need to know it matters.

Take them with you to the store or anywhere and talk about THEM. Your children are more important than you are, put them first.

Encourage your children to have faith. Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me and do not be a hindrance." He is the "friend that sticks closer than a brother" and the one they can talk to in the night and from the shadows and they can tell Him anything.