Dear Abby: I have had a wonderful and fulfilling career, and a life with a few hard bumps along the road. My wife and I enjoy spending time together as empty nesters.
For the last 16 years, I have built and led several not-for-profit organizations. After the last experience ended, we relocated, and I now have a less-demanding job I hope will take me into my retirement.
I enjoy the position, but how do I prepare for a rewarding and fulfilling life once I’m no longer fully employed? My wife and I plan to winter in Florida, do some traveling and enjoy life. I have some hobbies I look forward to spending time on, but I’m hoping for more than just that. Looking back, I wonder if I may have devoted too much to my career.
I guess I’m having trouble letting go of the wheel, the pace and the high expectations I have lived by all my adult life. Have you any suggestions to help me prepare for the next chapter? I will continue to help others and volunteer, but I need some guidance.
— Trouble Letting Go
Dear Trouble: Before retiring, make sure you are really ready to take that next step and discuss with your wife what that will mean to both of you. Between helping others, volunteering, traveling and splitting the year between two different communities, I suspect you will be plenty busy.
Now that you will have the time, use some of it to see your children and grandchildren, if there are any. Remember, too, the importance of staying physically as well as mentally active, and perhaps consider mentoring someone if the opportunity presents itself.
Dear Abby: My wonderful 82-years-young father-in-law and mother-in-law still exercise regularly, and it shows. They are both beautiful and healthy. I was particularly impressed when my father-in-law recently informed me that, on a daily basis, he “practices” getting up from a fall by lying down on the floor and then getting up without using his hands. He said he repeats the process several times a day because it keeps his core strong. I think it’s brilliant. Perhaps other seniors reading this will incorporate this practice into their daily routine if they are able to.
— Blessed Daughter-in-Law in California
Dear Blessed: I’m glad you shared what your in-laws are doing in order to remain healthy. Anyone who hasn’t tried lying on the floor and getting up without using their hands may be in for a surprise the first time they try. It isn’t as easy as it sounds. The “trick” is to roll onto your knees and lift yourself one leg at a time without touching your thighs. I tried it, and I can do it — but it took some practice. I encourage people of all ages to try.
Dear Readers: I’m wishing a Happy Father’s Day to fathers everywhere — birth fathers, stepfathers, adoptive and foster fathers, grandfathers, and all of those caring men who mentor children and fill the role of absent dads. And a big shout-out to dual-role moms. I applaud you all.
— Love, Abby
Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, Calif. 90069.